Embracing the Shadow… and why we’re in denial that we even have one…


There is something which is so little talked about in personal development, and it’s that everyone has a shadow side. We all have a side to our nature which we repress or deny, but it’s this side of ourselves which creates the recurring patterns we struggle with. It’s this side of our nature which causes our negative behaviour and judgement towards others, makes us feel judged by others, and takes offence when others are different to us and points out those differences.

We tend to be able to see everyone else’s issues without problem, but we feel deeply offended when someone dares to see ours. Read More →

Can men and women ever really just be friends?…


This can be a very tricky question to answer, and it’s one we’ve been asked many times. We were called by BBC Radio only last week to take part in a radio discussion on exactly this subject.

Male/female friendships –  it’s a line that can so often be misread, become confused, or cause upset not only for those in the friendship, but for any new partner who enters into the equation too.

My personal belief about this, is that it is possible for a man and woman to be friends, provided that one of them isn’t secretly harbouring a secret attraction towards the other without their knowledge. If one of them is hoping for something more, then it’s not really a true friendship, because one is lying to the other about their part in the relationship. Read More →

How to Build an ‘Affair-Proof’ Relationship…


Firstly, it’s important to point out that there is no absolute way of guaranteeing an affair proof relationship. There are many factors to take into account; who your partner is as an individual, how they feel about themselves which will often determine how responsive they are to attention from others, whether they maintain healthy boundaries, and how drawn they are to variety, to name but a few. If these aren’t regularly occurring issues, then there are some fundamental things that every couple can do to make their relationship as strong and ‘affair proof’ as possible.

Affairs generally tend to begin when one partner’s needs are not being met within the relationship. Yet how many of us don’t even know what our own needs are, never mind our partner’s? Read More →

No one wants to talk about this… but why?


There was a wise little acorn who fell off an oak tree. He found himself among all the other little acorns who were also laying on the ground. Each little acorn had a feeling that they were destined for something special, but they didn’t quite know what. So they set about working hard to develop their potential. They began doing all they could to become shiny… They were attending workshops called ‘Make the Best of Your Shell’, where they learned how to wipe away dust when it settled on them. The little acorns felt wonderful with bright, shiny shells for a few days… until the next heavy rainfall came, splattering them with mud and making their shells dull again. So they went about finding the next shell-development workshop which would remind them how to shine their shells again… and the process would repeat over and over again. Read More →

Life and learning – the best bits!


Isn’t life completely amazing? I look back over the last 12 years at some of the lessons that have had such a powerful impact on the way I now embrace life. I know without doubt that I, like you, am an incredible human being, connected to everyone and everything around me, with the power to create my life.

Fear is disabling, and if it’s present in your thoughts and energy, then it doesn’t matter what you want to create, whether it’s a loving relationship, a new job or a successful business, fearful beliefs will tend to expand in your life. Read More →